Why Fall For Fall?

Soon this beauty will turn into....
(CEB II)

...this ominous sign of winter. Good times!
(CEB II)

Oh, how I dread the day I remove my air conditioner. How I dread the reports of the impending 1st frost conquering the landscape. Today was the 1st day I even thought about looking for my gloves, the gloves which I desperately need when the mercury starts dropping, for I'm not myself when my hands get even the slightest feeling of going through the refrigeration process. Now I have started the days of not wanting to get out of bed, not because I despise mornings in general, but I have to walk out of bed introduced to freeze-shock. An oh, how these days make me remember when I was dragging myself to the bus stop through the pine needles and broken brush. It is the indicator of one thing: Yes folks, fall is in full swing, a.k.a., the season of being surrounded by death. Sorry if I sound like Scrooge for the next few minutes, but I'm don't buy into the whole "autumnal bliss" hype. Gone are the days of swimming pools, wearing Hawaiian shirts for no reason, short clothing (which makes for great sightseeing come beach time!) and outdoor lounging without the goosebumps and in comes some activities and phenomenon that I don't quite (and probably never will) understand. For example, I never understood the whole foliage watching thing. Yeah, all the leaves change into a kaleidoscope of varying colors, but you are basically watching them die, along with that yellow grass and those dead leaves you're stepping on. Those dead leaves by the way are now the nemesis of my life as I have pretty much devoted every day of the last week cleaning one sector of my yard after another of these "pretty" ruby red, lemon yellow and fire orange leaves. All of the raking and sweeping seems futile, as more leaves just seem to pile on almost instantaneously after you spent all that time toiling. Or how about apple picking? Call me a cynic, but where exactly is the fun there? First off, I have my own apple trees in my backyard which are just as good, so it wouldn't make sense to pay just to pick apples off another person's property. You're outside in nippy weather doing what is basically a chore, something I would have done anything to avoid when I was 11, believe me. Would you go out picking onions in the same conditions? How about weeding the guy's strawberry garden? On top of that, I have this superficial worry of some middle-aged woman asking me in broken/awful Spanish to climb up to the tall branch, thinking I am one of those hard-working migrant workers with whom I share an ethnicity and a skin color with, which wouldn't exactly make my mood better. Meanwhile, you are blocking the thoughts of wrapping your body with 2 to 5 layers of sweatshirts, scarfs, beanie hats and specialized socks, all as you are trying to remind yourself under a gray sky that it is only gonna get worse in a couple months. Or I could just cover myself with the dead grass on my joyous hayride. Just writing all of this is convincing me to start collecting bunker quantities of Vitamin C and Campbell's. Daylight savings is almost as futile of an attempt to push up the remaining daylight as my recent attempts to clean my yard as of late. On top of that, I'm thinking of all that money I'm gonna spend on Chap Stick and Lubriderm just to keep my skin from looking like the surface of the Mojave. Sure there are moments, like the random pick-up football game, my recently renewed interest in Halloween, the feast of Thanksgiving, NFL football and the highly-anticipated birthday of yours truly. However in the grand scheme of things, autumn in my opinion isn't anything to fall for. Especially if you know what dreaded season follows it. And if you live up in the New England area, you know that winter lasts longer than the customary three months. But don't worry about me, ladies and gents. I'll try to put a smile on my face when I go out for my next raking, knowing that the ice and snow is not far behind.

Mochaman's Fantasy Football Report
- Boston Beersquad - 4-1 (3rd, Plax's Got a Gun, 2nd in Division 2, 607.66 Pts.)
The Giants D, along with Warner, Fitzgerald, Brown and a possible breakthrough week for Portis helped propel me not only to victory, but to an overall undefeated record for Division 2 teams against D1. Won against the 2nd highest scoring team in the entire league coming in, and I come out the 2nd highest scorer, not a small feat. Facing the #1 this week, thus I hope my players bring their A-game to become the creme de la creme.

- Killa' Beavaz - 3-2 (2nd, Yahoo Public 179914, 523.68 Pts.)
Put a 72.8 point blowout show on my opponent, and I should have, considering my opponent didn't have a QB for last week. Special thanks to McNabb, Marshall, Fitzgerald and Ronnie Brown for the beatdown. Have to get a running back for next week to compensate the Dolphins bye week coming up. Knowshon and Donald Brown are in my view. Like my Beersquad, huge week as I face the # 1 team in the league, and this one is undefeated. Stay tuned!