Ouch! I Think A Piece Of Sky Hit Me

So much for the "high reward" part.
(espn.com)

Well, that was warped. I feel like one of Mike Tyson's opponents during the mid 80's, wondering if the beat down that just happened actually occurred. This locking myself in my room and listening to Coldplay-therapy isn't doing the trick either. This might be a tell tale sign that I might need to get more involved spiritually with God. Or maybe I should just pick up a drinking habit, which is frankly much easier and depending on the situation, a whole lot more fun! I knew before this humongously important set of games that we were potentially in trouble. The Yankees have been just firing on all cylinders and the Rays were starting to awake. Low and behold, the Sox got drained (again) by some Tampa theatrics. Then to the Bronx where we were outscored 25-8, while agonizing through a 31 2/3 inning scoreless stretch in which the bats were as cold as Ted Williams's corpse. The 4 gamer was a microcosm of those first 8 contests in that the Yanks beat us in every possible way, similar to the way the Sox triumphed seemingly so long ago. However unlike the previous 8, this series drastically shifted the power structure of not only the division race, but possibly displayed to the nation who has the gusto for a strong postseason run. For the first time, many experts around the country have used their erasers on their preseason prognostications. And it only seems to get worse. On top of the 6.5 games that the Sox are trailing by in the East and the Wild Card deadlock with the Rangers, Boston will return home, but will face the AL Central leading Tigers team, who have won 5 out of the last 6. Boston will then fly back over to Arlington, where they got swept just a few weeks ago, to face the Rangers. Considering that we are 10-18 against the AL West and with all the weaknesses I see on this club, you could only imagine how much I'm looking forward to the September 14th matchup with the Bills. The Sox are 8-14 since the break and have lost a combined 9.5 games in the standings to their pinstriped rivals. No Sox fan can't help but reminisce of that infamous 5 game series in August 2006 where they saw their team pull a TWA Flight #800, exposing their true lack of depth. I, like the rest, feel that this past series almost felt no different, possibly even worse. This week, they went 0-6 against the teams that they were supposed to stay competitive with at this point in the season. This past road trip (3-6) was a true display of how the Sox may be the weakest link in this year's AL East elite, especially when the only wins come against a 40-win Orioles team. The Sox now are like Britney Spears during her year-long meltdown in the fact that there has already been an obituary written for them, even if there is no presence of a death certificate. Like the world-famous pop star, they showed so much promise in the beginning, like as if they were never going to fall off that pedestal no matter who the competition was. But every glaring hole soon started to creep up to the surface. Our lack of a quality third starter, our non presence of a long reliever and our persistent black hole at shortstop are a few of many maladies. We have everything but the pregnant teenage sister going against us, although the Ortiz scandal doesn't exactly put these recent weeks in high regard. The fat lady hasn't sung yet, but she's humming "Taps" as we speak. And don't trip over that chunk of troposphere on the way out.

Evan Longoria = My Grim Reaper
(i2.cdn.turner.com)

Aaaaaaaaahhh yes, the series that I feared the most (well, until the recent Yankee series). Rewind to Tuesday where the Sox started this ill-fated week in St. Pete. The Lester-Garza matchup hadn't been successful for the Sox in recent contests, but it looked like our fortunes would turn. But as usual, 2 runs wasn't gonna be enough to hold up the fort. Enter, Evan Longoria, a.k.a. the personification of all my nightmares, who launched a game-tying bomb off the recent Sox wunderkind Daniel Bard. I was too distraught to even think about that fact that this wouldn't be the last test he would fail on this dreaded rivalry week. I was even more distraught when the Sox ended up on the wrong end of a 13-inning battle when guess who hit a two-run bomb to sink Saito and the Sox, with the first base bag in search of vacancy. The next game didn't bode so well either. Bradley Wayne Penny kept on being consistently inconsistent as he allowed 5 ER in 6 IP in a game that desperately needed an innings eater. In fact, Penny has only won two decisions with a 4.82 ERA since the 5th of June, while not posting a 7 inning start this entire season. On the other end, Game 7 hero David Price performed brilliantly, while being helped out by four long balls en route to a 6-4 victory. Once again, the series proved that the Rays can match up to Boston in any facet of the game. They ran the bases, they hit in clutch situations and they weren't scared of us in the slightest bit. They had the ability and swagger of those Big Red Machine teams of the 1970s, and they whooped us in similar fashion. And it was the usual suspects: Longoria, Garza, Peña, Crawford, Bartlett and now Pat the Bat is getting into the act. Plus I also question the use of the talented but obscenely green Bard in this 8th inning pressure cooker when Okajima has actually been the the primary guy for the Sox in that role. Unfortunately, the Longoria Show in Game 1 wouldn't be the only time I almost had my brain explode questioning this very decision. In the grand scheme of things, the Sox gave the sleeping giant Rays the caffeine they needed to help them rumble back into contention. The last thing the Sox needed to do was to bring another team back into the race, especially before going into New York in the middle of a free fall.

Does Kate Hudson count as a PED?
(espn.com)

The Smoltz-Chamberlain matchup didn't look pretty at all on paper, and ended up being uglier when it was played out. Smoltz allowed 8 ER in 3 1/3 innings, giving him a head start to find a proper retirement home. It was a beat down that only Muhammad Ali could appreciate, and did. I painfully admit and I'm deeply ashamed that I was not only on the Smoltz bandwagon, but I was driving it while drinking the spiked Kool-Aid. But hey, it's sometimes better to jump off bloodied than to burn in the flames. And is it just me, or does Billy Traber have the funkiest windup for a batting practice pitcher? You know the season is taking a turn for the Susan Boyle when Billy Traber becomes your saving grace for the bullpen. In Game 2 (a.k.a., the most important game of the series), the Beckett/Burnett duel was finally worth the billing as both pitchers kept the bats silent. In fact, it was a trend that the relievers continued, until Alex Rodriguez* took a hanging Tazawa breaking ball over the left centerfield wall, all as I pleaded for those 5+ hours of my life back. Once again, the Sox were on the wrong end of an ESPN Classic game that I will always surf over. I have to give credit to Clay Buchholz, who didn't wiz himself in the Saturday afternoon game and pitched an admirable game. However, the offense was still in Cancun somewhere, as the Sox could muster only 4 hits off Cheeseburger Cheeseburger Sabathia and crew. In the final game, Sox Ace 1b Jon Lester kept the team in the game long enough to combat an A-Rod* homer and to allow V-Mart to rocket the team to a 2-1 lead. But the lack of depth would once again turn around to snatch defeat in the jaws of victory. Again the victim was the young Danny Bard, who allowed back-to-back homers with 2 outs to former Sox Johnny Damon and the almost-future Sox first baseman Mark Teixeira ($180 million looks like a bargain now, huh Henry?), preventing the Sox not only of a win in the series, but even having a single lead after a completed inning. For a Sox team with seemingly little to no magic this year, it was that proverbial final nail to a coffin painted in fools' gold. So what did this 4 game series prove? The depth that was once owned by the Red Sox during the 8-0 days has swiftly changed. We have a #5 hitter (Ortiz) who his hitting .219 and a .252 hitter in the cleanup spot (Bay) who is lumped in right now with all of our other injury-prone outfielders. But besides the Yanks having a .280 hitter for a #9 hitter, simply take a look at the game that went that grueling 15. While the Red Sox may have a better bullpen in the realm of statistical analysis, the Yankees have the tool of endurance on their side. While Alfredo Aceves and Brian Bruney cruised through five scoreless innings, the Sox utilized five different pitchers in that same span (Miss Masterson yet?) forcing us to have to debut Junichi Tazawa in a life or death situation in the middle of a division race in August. It wasn't so much the long-game defeats that killed us, but it was the lack of pitchers that could go the distance. In the end, our pitching depth was as much of a myth as the flight of Icarus, and unfortunately the Sox's season is following a similar trajectory path to fatality.

Foxboro, here I come!
(patriots.com)

While one local team is in a Tom Petty-style free fall, the eyes of New Englanders slowly turn over to Foxboro, MA where the Patriots look to surge back into the playoffs after being denied entry despite an 11 win season. This Thursday, the Pats will work out some of their preseason kinks against McNabb's Eagles. This is the 1st time on Cloud 10 that I have dedicated any significant time to in writing about the local football squad. But to be honest, I do not have much Patriots news to even react that boldly on. Wilfork and the higher-ups are discussing extension (sign him!), DE/OLB Derrick Burgess is the most recent addition (helps diversify the pass rush a bit) and Tom Brady got a cake to the face while most importantly maintaining every ligament in that left knee. All while the Pats stand as Vegas's preseason favorite to win Super Bowl XLIV, even over the current world champion Steelers. The only major story line for me seems to be whether Tom Brady can pull off a solid season after a whole year with no contact. After all, Peyton Manning had a shaky 3-4 start after his left knee infection, all before pulling off a 9 game win streak to close the season en fuego. Offense however, isn't my main concern. With playmakers like Moss, Welker, Galloway and Taylor, the team will not have trouble racking up the points. The defense, captained by the 36 year old Tedy Bruschi, has an interesting blend of experience and talent. Acquisitions like Shawn Springs and Derrick Burgess may not blow people away, but at the same time the moves allowed the Patriots to construct a complete team that shoud make a run past New Year's. Other than Brady Watch, the buzz has been at a standstill at Patriots training camp. But believe me, the doldrums of NFL training camp has been the Pepto-Bismol for my raging mind this past week. Goes to show that sometimes no news is the best news you can receive.

Mochaman's Fantasy Baseball Report

- Bubba Gump Shrimpz - 136-97-19 (2nd, Steroid Freaks' Anonymous, 7.5 GB)
Apparently the Shrimpz have loved living on the edge lately. Another close victory to avenge a loss early in the season, which still places me in striking distance to take back the top spot. Survived two subpar Dan Haren starts, who has had an un-Haren like 4.94 ERA since the break. Offense wasn't helped out by the fact that the other team had Carl Crawford plus 3 Yankees battling the sinking Red Sox this week. With some lackadaisical showings the past few weeks, I need a strong week to make a statement that I'm still in it to win it.

- Mocha Sox - 80-93-7 (9th, Yahoo Public 38095, 21.5 GB)
It would be an understatement to say that I came up small. Followed up a 10-0 performance last week with a 1-9 against the league leader, which needless to say was like a kick to J.D. Drew's groin. Now go from one of the threats of the league to being threatened to a cellar re-entrance. Other than Halladay and Wandy Rodriguez, the pitching left a lot more to be desired while the hitting has been stunted with the Justin Upton DL stint. Need a solid week against the team directly below me, or it could be curtains to a Mocha Magic Cinderella run.

- Firehawks - 77-91-12 (9th, Yahoo Public 162279, 25.5 GB)
Have lost 4 out of the last 6 series, including another horrible offensive display. Like the Mochas, the 'Hawks are facing the 10th place squad in hopes to not be buried in fantasy obscurity for '09. Might have to pull the trigger on a Beckett or Lester deal before the Aug. 16th deadline to revitalize the offense that has been as stale as an MRE. Only 10 GB out of playoff contention with 4 matchups to go. Three of those matchups are against all the teams currently behind me, so I still have the postseason in mind for my pyro-avian club.