We're living on the edge here at Cloud 10! I decided to try out this whole gamecast thing with soccer as Spanish League champs F.C. Barcelona battle the Seattle Sounders of the MLS at Qwest Field. I figure it would help me get more adapted to soccer if I watch the match with the same focus and intensity as I do with a baseball game, even if it is only preseason. Seeing world-class players like Messi, Henry, and Xavi in these stateside contests only boosts my interest as the games get closer to counting. Besides, after another subpar performance by guess who, I have to find some other diversion to get my mind off possibly being a third place club. The worst part of it all is Smoltz is starting the series at the Jack in the Bronx against all those left-handers, but I'll stop myself before I go Lou Ferrigno. Readers take warning, this is probably the biggest experiment I have done on this blog, and this soccer gamecast has an equal chance of being a Gigli as much as it can be a Dark Knight. But hey, at least I'm not actually blowing up anything. Better to do this now than to lay a goose egg in a Champions League match. Visca El Barça!
10:38 PM - Wow! Good to see Celtics legend Bill Russell in the house, especially in a stadium of green in Seattle. Also saw a graphic of some of the preseason attendance figures since the middle of July. 80,000? 90,000? Let's just say soccer fans take their preseason a little bit more seriously. By the way, 63,000 on hand tonight in the Field called Qwest, which probably challenges the figures of last year's Seahawks season.
10:42 PM - Looks like Barça is sporting the sherbet colored tops tonight. I don't think there is any uniform in baseball, or in any other sport, that makes me crave frozen yogurt quite like these ones.
10:44 PM - The Sounders had a solid chance, but finished with weak strike. This was immediately followed by a break by Messi in the box, but Barça couldn't capitalize. Noticing that soccer players probably have on average the best hair of any athletes in the world. It's just flowing. This is why Rogaine should plaster their name on a set of jerseys. It just makes complete marketing sense.
10:47 PM - Messi draws a foul just outside the box. It just looked like the Seattle defenders didn't watch any of La Liga last season and didn't expect him to make a run for it. Solid free kick opportunity coming up.
10:48 PM - Aaaaaaaaaaaaaand that was two feet over the bar. Have a feeling though that Messi will create more opportunities. And he's only 22? Ronaldo, be ready to be dethroned!
10:50 PM - Surprisingly a lot of Sounders fans, considering there were more Barça fans in Pasadena last weekend than Galaxy fans. Although I'm not getting the "This Side Up" signs. Is this soccer lingo like the "Juiced Up" signs in baseball games? Somebody help me out!
10:51 PM - Tough attempt at a bicycle kick for Thierry Henry. Has an uncanny resemblance to Vin Diesel. Really should try being a body double if they do another XXX remake. Speaking of needing some Rogaine.....
10:53 PM - Messi and the gang are schooling the Seattle defense once again. However, no conversion after the defenders made a stand on the last moment, forcing a weak cross to Henry. Barça already smelling blood, just in time for 'Shark Week'.
10:56 PM - First corner of the day being taken by Seattle. Immediately falls short. Messi gets another opportunity to help Barcelona break out, but a nice save by Keller. He could easily be like Satchel Paige and just call off the rest of the players off the pitch and play himself.
11:00 PM - Almost a Buckneresque blunder by Barça keeper Pinto as he passes right to a charging Seattle forward. Luckily, the shot misses by a half-foot. Now I see how goalies separate themselves in this sport.
11:01 PM - YEEEEEEEEESSSSS! Soon after the missed opportunity, Leo Messi strikes one home from behind the box and puts Barça on the board with a 21st minute goal. 1-0 for the sherbet tops! #45 Ultimate Rule of Sports: You can't give Adrian Peterson, LeBron, Ray Allen or Leo Messi any space. They're just that good.
11:05 PM - Messi almost capitalizes on yet ANOTHER opportunity. Is this guy really human? They should just put mannequins in the box. because it will basically yield the same results. ESPN now does a shot of Sounders fans bouncing up and down. Somehow doesn't have the look of Old Trafford, but not bad for America.
11:11 PM - The young striker Bojan gets tripped up near the box, but no call is made. 30 seconds later, Busquets receives a yellow near the middle of the pitch. I may be biased, but I have a different view on the severity of these fouls. At least we're not seeing Flop-o-palooza tonight.
11:13 PM - Dani Alves has his "It's On" face directed toward Ljungberg. Looks like somebody might get all Prince Fielder in a few minutes. All I can say is this is nothing like the Mayor's Cup in Fort Myers. Not even close. Soccer easily has the best preseason of any sport. Imagine 80,000 at a Sox-Pirates game on a March afternoon in Florida with fans waving colored towels.
11:15 PM - Uh oh! I guess he is human after all. Seeing Leo roll on the ground is not good. Then again, soccer players get down and up so quickly from seemingly painful blows. Voodoo must be in the soccer physician booklet. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnd voila!
11:17 PM - DAMN! Bojan caught offside. I have to say, that it's the only rule that really slows soccer down, but it's legitimate. Sometimes disputable, but legit. Also liking no commercial breaks after every play.
11:19 PM - NOOOOOO! Pass to a wide open Messi is followed with a little squib kick that taps off the right post. This game could easily be 6-0, but a dominant performance by Barça so far. This feels like it would probably be a 24-3 advantage in American football.
11:21 PM - MESSI SCORES AGAIN!!!! And set up by the magical Xavi. Unbelievable cross and goal near the net on the 40th minute. Way to be primetime! I'm guessing he's gonna be about 80% of the highlight reel for this game, and he will probably only play this half!
11:24 PM - PHEW! Fredy Montero of Seattle doesn't capitalize on a pass from Zakuani. Probably got all confused that he didn't see any sherbet tops in front of him and freaked out. Barça is totally outclassing this Seattle team, and this is one of the best that the MLS can provide.
11:26 PM - OH MAN! Messi makes a beautiful pass and almost sets up Bojan goal if it wasn't for some last second defensive effort by the Sounders. And they call Albert Pujols "The Machine"? Only 1 minute of extra time.
11:28 PM - First half has officially ended. Seeing more why Messi is the considered by many the best player in the world. Evidence of how Barça produces some of the finest players through their system. What a show!
11:30 PM - Just saw a commercial for next year's World Cup, provoking excitement. Then I saw that KGB commercial where the guy loses a bet with his buddy and has to wear the chick's KGB skimpy outfit, leaving the girl with only a swimsuit. Surprisingly not that bad looking. Like ketchup is to food, bikinis are to commercials with sneaky-hot redheads.
11:44 PM - Barça has the advantage in shots taken by a tally of 16 to 3 after the 1st half. Ouch! Seeing why MLS isn't quite catching on in the States. What would be the equivalent score in a hockey game? 8-1? 11-1? Getting ready for the 2nd half.
11:52 PM - Looking like a more defensive half right now. Just found out that Messi is only 5'7''. I love guys that are superstars in my height group. Lumps him right in there with the Pedroias and the Welkers. Huge respect!
11:56 PM - Just have to mention that it has been good to watch a sporting event and haven't had to hear any cowbell for one minute of it. Or those horns that sound like a swarm of killer bees is lurking over the arena. I guess I'll have to put the mental institution on hold.
12:01 AM - YES! Going off on a tangent here. Just found ot that the A's went ahead of the Rangers, which would help the Sox in the AL Wild Card if they pull through. Hate being excited about that, but I think for the 2nd year in a row there will be another Home Run Derby in the Bronx tomorrow with Smoltzy on the mound (Feelin' a little Ferrigno. Must stop.).
12:04 AM - After seeing some of the chants of the Seattle crowd, I still can't take a totally animated American MLS soccer crowd seriously. I just cant. It's just a little weird. It just seems like the ownership invited a religious cult that happened to dress in the team's colors and paid them to do one of their sermons in the stands. Just noticing ESPN putting up Real Madrid's big signings. Also can't take a player named Kaká seriously.
12:10 AM - Offense picking up a little from both sides, including chances by Barcelona's Pedro and Gudjohnsen. Sensing that even the Seattle crowd already misses Messi running up and down their defenders.
12:13 AM - Guess who's in the owner's box? None other than Price is Right host Drew Carey, who is apparently part-owner of the Sounders. I would have expected him to own a team in his native Cleveland. His team might need to do a little improv with Wayne Brady to pull off a miracle here.
12:14 AM - GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!! The Sounders had no chance as Suarez was set up by a beautiful cross from Pedro Rodriguez. 3-0 Barça in the 75th minute. Unless a 21 year old Pelé is suiting up for Seattle, I think we can say game over.
12:20 AM - 2nd booking of the night, this time called on Seattle's Fucito on the 84th minute. A little late to be making rough challenges don't you think?
12:24 AM- 66,848 fans have officially shown up at the Field called Qwest, making it the largest crowd in Seattle soccer history. What a difference an elite European team can make. However, I am impressed that this is a first year MLS team, and that they are on the verge of making it to the playoffs. For the other professional leagues there would have been an investigation had one of their expansion franchises played well enough for even third place.
12:28 AM - GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL! Another goal, this time scored by Pedro himself as he capitalizes off a keeper's rebound. With a 4-0 lead in the 89th minute, I really think this one is truly over. Maybe Drew Carey will have contestants on the show be defenders for the Sounders after this debacle. Another fruit in the talented Barça youth pool comes through. 2 minutes of extra time.
12:32 AM - Game over! The Sherbet Army wins the showcase in dominating fashion. And the game finished in the time it would take 2 innings of a Yankees-Red Sox playoff game. Once again, Barça showed that they are the class of European football. Makes me more impatient in waiting for the season opener against Sporting Gijón in a couple of weeks. Well, I must say, doing a soccer gamecast is much more difficult because the ball is always moving and their is potential that something crazy could happen after one missed dribble. No constant timeouts in the last 2 minutes or stepping out of the box to distract the pitcher, which leaves little time to type any witticisms. My biggest hope is that I didn't pull off a Ben Affleck performance on this one. Well, off to one of my Seinfeld binges before bed time! Morning folks!
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment